Fabulous Mother’s Day Gift—Under $15.00!

by Dean Hervochon on May 2, 2011

Dress Up Cheap Flowers To Make them Look Really Expensive

Simple Flowers in a Pot

The picture at the right is of some beautiful potted flowers I bought at Costo for $10.99.   They are beautiful just as they are, but if you want to give them as a gift, you’ve got to fix them up a little. The great thing about these bulb flowers is that Mom can plant them in the garden after they’ve wilted and they’ll come up next year.  You’ll be her favorite kid.

The container isn’t very pretty and it doesn’t look like it was bought someplace “exclusive.”  I have a reputation—so if I’m giving these flowers as a gift, they gotta getta a little “WOW” in them.  This is very easy to do and it will look like you bought it at an expensive florist.

Turning 10.99 Flowers into Something Really Special With Fiber Paper and Ribbon

You Can Do This!

1. Find some beautiful flowers that are in a container.  They can be rooted or in a vase.  I prefer rooted.

2. Make sure that the flowers aren’t dripping water — you can’t start this unless you’re assured that the container won’t wet your paper.

3. Find some beautiful paper.  I love fiber wrapping paper — it’s easy to work with, if it gets wet it’s not ruined and it really looks impressive. Find this paper on-line: “fiber wrapping paper, discount” or in a specialty gift wrap shop, and possibly at Costco.  If it comes in sheets, it’s about .50 cents per sheet.   A roll shouldn’t be over $10.00  Keep a stash of them at home. Get them today so you’ll be prepared if something like this pops up and you need a fab gift really quickly. For Mother’s Day, pick a paper that is your mother’s favorite color.  You know her favorite color, don’t you?

4. Find a ribbon that goes with the paper. I personally like mono-chromatic themes, it’s classy. Orange paper with orange ribbon. It’s not crucial, but that’s what I like.

5. Place the flowers in the middle of a square piece of paper. You’ll need about 10 inches of paper above the top of the container, so make sure that your paper is large enough.  If it’s a bigger pot, you’ll need two longer pieces that are laid over one another in the shape of a squared cross. If you can use one piece, all the better — so try to use containers that are smaller/shorter.

6. Cut a piece of ribbon that is about 24 inches longer than what will fit around the container. When cutting the ribbon, do not cut it straight across. Cut it at an angle, it looks better.

Mom Will Think You Spent a Fortune! This is our secret! Right?

7. Gather the paper up around the sides of the container and put the ribbon around what you’ve gathered. It will probably be difficult to tie the ribbon around the container itself —as it tends to slip down. Instead, tie the ribbon above the container, up where the base of the flowers are and this will hide the dirt.

8. Cinch and tie the ribbon with a double knot around the paper, just above the rim of the container — not too tight but not too loose either — you don’t want the flowers to look strangled.  Make sure that when you’ve tying the knot that the extra ribbon is about the same length from each end of the knot.

9. You’re almost there!  Take another piece of ribbon, about 36 inches long and fold the ribbon on top of itself — pinch it in the middle with your fingers as you do each fold-over to keep it together.  You should be looping the ribbon back onto itself into about 6 inch folds.  Don’t press down the loops on the ends!  You don’t want creases in the ends of the bow. The bow folds don’t have to be exact and there’s really no certain number of folds you need either.

See How Happy Your Mom Will Be?

10. While pinching the the folded ribbon in the middle, put it up to that double knot on the ribbon that is holding up the paper on the plant.  Use the two ends of that ribbon to tie a knot around what you’re holding.   Spread out the folds and you’ll see your ribbon materialize right before your eyes.  Adjust it as you like—make it pretty!  Tie a second knot and with the ribbon that’s left over, tie a bow  (like you’re tying your shoes). Trim any excess ribbon off.   It’s done! It takes about 10 minutes to do this.  Don’t forget the card!

Other Great Ideas:  Hostess Gift, Father’s Day, Anniversaries, Birthdays, Gifts For People Who Have Everything. Great to Bring To A Dinner Party.  Use at Your Own Parties.   A Great Centerpiece for a Dinner Party.

Use Your Imagination! You don’t have to spend a lot to give expensive looking, beautiful gifts.

*And don’t forget that if you always keep the fiber paper and ribbon on hand, you can run to Home Depot or Costco and create incredible gifts for a fraction of the price.

Let me know how it goes!  You can do this.   —d—

{ 4 comments }

How To Meet a Prince — Trust Me!

by Dean Hervochon on April 29, 2011

Prince William — Added Bonus! Guys who Shoot Skeet Love Dogs Too!

Are you really ready to meet a great guy? You want a man who acts like a prince?  You’re not going to believe this answer.

Ready?

You go skeet shooting!

Don’t stop reading! Not only will you have a blast shooting skeet, but you’re going to bag a man too! 

This is the best advice on how to get a guy you’ll ever hear.

Really polite, outdoorsy, fun-loving and probably rich guys go skeet shooting. Girls…put on some tight clothes, pick up a shotgun, and get to work! Forget your aversion to killing animals, there aren’t any to shoot when you’re going skeet/trap shooting. The only “game” you’re going home with is a hot guy. Believe me! Play this right and you’ll invite me to your Royal Wedding.

This may sound odd, but I think that you’re most likely to meet a “prince” if you’ve never gone skeet shooting before. There’s nothing more sexy than a “damsel in distress” and that’s exactly what I was the first time I engaged in skeet shooting. The guys in the stand (that’s the box on stilts that you shoot from) knew that we didn’t know how to shoot skeet because as soon as we got there, we looked like deer in headlights. They offered to share the stand with us. Very nice! When we said “Ah no, we’re just going to watch for awhile,” they lit up like Christmas trees! They were going to help us! I think there’s some kind of sportsman’s code they all live by. It makes them all as polite and helpful as a gay guy working in a women’s shoe department! Use it! Take full advantage of it! These are straight guys acting like gay guys! They didn’t care who they helped, they just wanted to help.  Loved it! You’re not going to find this anyplace else on Earth, except maybe at an ACLU meeting.

You Don't Have to be a Grizzly Mama to Go Shooting!

Once we admitted it was our first time, the guys proceeded to show us how to do it. They insisted that we shoot their guns and shoot at their clay pigeons (those discs that fly into the air) to get a feel for it. If my shoulders weren’t so big I’m sure he would have wrapped his huge muscular arms around me.

Note to girls: DO NOT wear shoulder pads!

To skeet shoot, the first thing you’ve got to do is find a gun club or shooting range that rents shotguns — most of them do but not all of them. Call the range and tell them it’s your first time and ask them what you should expect when you get there and if they have any rules about first-time shooters. Ask them what time is a good time to go — and don’t pay attention to what they say! Go on a Saturday or Sunday morning when the men will be there.

When you show up to the range, you’re going to see a lot of really nice cars in the lot. Just sayin’. Check in and ask the folks who work at the range to show you how to use the gun. Ask loudly enough so any men in the vacinity can hear. They’ll be all over you offering assistance.

If the range offers a class on how to shoot the gun, and there are lots of hot guys around, don’t be stupid! Do not take the class!  Are you getting it?

Don’t go alone. Bring a girlfriend with you. Skeet shooting works best in pairs because someone has to press the button that flings the clay pigeon into the air when you yell “pull.”

If a nice guy helps you and he has nice breath, offer to buy him a beer when you’re through. You’ll figure it out.

Don’t be too scared — they’ll take good care of you and you’ll really enjoy shooting the guns — I promise! It’s a lot of fun.

Happy Hunting Ladies!

Who’s got a better place to meet a man?  Let’s hear it!

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Oprah’s Skin Care Regimen — You Can Do Better

by Dean Hervochon on April 28, 2011

Don’t Waste Your Money!

Updated Information!:  Click Here for Updated Post

I watched Oprah the other day and she had a dermatologist on the show who was telling women how they could look twenty years younger. A big part of it is facial skin care and he said you’ve got to tend to that skin on your upper chest too. His skin care line is Lancer Skin Care Products. I’m sure it’s good stuff. He has three products in his line: Polish / Cleanse / Repair. It’ll cost you $200 to buy all three — if you can get it now that Oprah’s gone all ga ga over it. These products might last you a full month.

Good for Oprah. She can spend $2,400 a year on face products. Can you?

Highest Rated Facial Scrub, $10.00

Dr. Lancer’s Polish ($50): You gently scrub your face once a week, which gets rid of dead cells and enables new skin to grow. Everyone should do this. But why would you buy his exfoliation product for $50? Burt’s Bees Peach Willowbark Deep Pore Scrub is a much better and cheaper alternative. You can get it at Walgreens or CVS or get it online here: Burt’s Bees Deep Pore Scrub. It’s got all sorts of good things in it and it’s only $10.00. All you’re doing is removing dead skin — it doesn’t take a $50 product to do that.

Oprah, I expected more from you!

Dr. Lancer’s Extremely Clean Cleanser ($50): This is his gentle face wash that doesn’t have any color or perfumes or harsh chemicals added (but it does have non-harsh chemicals added?). It’s used to eliminate the daily build-up of oils and impurities on your face without stripping the necessary hydration. You’re going to need to use it twice a day. This is good advice, no matter what products you use. Once in the morning and once in the evening — especially if you wear make-up.

Here’s the skinny on his products and some alternatives and great advice from my Chicago dermatologist, Dr. Carolyn Jacob:

Cheaper Alternatives

Dr. Jacob recommended several things you can get over the counter that will do the job at a fraction of the cost.
Alpha Hydrox AHA Souffle Facial Cleanser Alpha Hydrox AHA Souffle Facial Cleanser

You need to wash your face twice a day with a cleanser that has a glycolic acid (AHA) in it. It’s best for oily to normal skin. Alpha Hydox AHA Suffle Facial Cleaner got rave reviews.  Buy it online for $16.00 by clicking here: Alpha Hydrox Suffle Facial Cleanser or you can buy it at some local pharmacies for $15.99. It’s kinda hard to find so you might want to just order it on line. If you have dry skin, Dr. Jacob recommends you use CeraVe Cleanser, you can get that at most drugstores or buy it online here: Cerve Cleanser

CeraVe Facial Cleanser for Dry Skin. Inexpensive Alternative

She also recommends that you use a product that contains Retinol in it after you wash your face at night. You can find several, but the Alpha Hydrox Retinol ResQ was the cheapest and very highly rated too. It’s about $16.00 online here:  Alpha Hydrox Retinol ResQ

Dr. Lancer’s Repair ($100): this is the “replenishing moisturizer,” which Oprah’s doc Lancer claims prevents aging and fills in tiny lines and wrinkles.  There are a lot of great moisturizers on the market and I doubt that Dr. Lancers is the only one that will work for you. Instead, Dr. Jacob recommends that you use a daily moisturizer that has an SPF 30 or higher in it and if it has AHA in it, all the better.

One thing I don’t recommend is that you go to a big department store and buy your moisturizer or these products. I seriously doubt that they’ll work any better than what’s recommended above and Oil of Olay products are excellent.  A great way to find excellent facial and body products is to go to your dermatologist — most sell medical-grade lotions and creams, and they’ll cost you a lot less than if you go to a department store and buy something that’s not as strong or as effective as what your dermatologist sells.

Here is my favorite “medical grade” line of skin products:  Glytone.  They have just about everything you need, at a price higher than what you will pay at the drugstore, but certainly a lot cheaper than Dr. Lancer’s products.  This is great stuff.  You have to “ease” into using these products because they are so strong.  You were warned!  Stick with it though — you’ll be really happy you did.  Click on the product if you’d like to buy it online or your dermatologist might carry it.

Glytone Facial Cleanser, $20.00

Glytone Night Cream with Retinol, $68.00 – Lasts a long time!

Glytone Moisturizer with SPF 15 Sunscreen $42.00

Glytone Body Lotion – Amazing stuff $25.00

Stop wasting your money.  Oprah can afford it — and you don’t need to!

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Gay Guy Picture Taking Rules!

by Dean Hervochon on April 27, 2011

The Washington Monument. Oh...the possibilities!

“Why don’t you come over and let’s go through my vacation pictures!”  Ohhhh God!  How many times have your friends asked you over to take a look at their “fabulous” vacation pictures…and you’d rather be…ironing your hair?  Enough said?  In most instances: B-O-R-I-N-G!   It’s unbelievable to me how many people have no idea how to take fun/interesting pictures.  What’s worse, is they expect you to “ooh and aah” over them.  I’m your friend, I’m not an actor! Balance photogs, you need balance when you’re taking a lot of pictures!

Puente de la Mujer Bridge, Argentina

Here are the Gay Guy rules for Picture Taking:

1. Make sure that there are people in most of your pictures — people we know would help.  If we can only have you, after awhile, try to get someone else who looks interesting in there with you too. Without people in your pictures, it becomes an endurance test looking at 300 pictures of Mount Kilimanjaro. If all that’s photographed is the mountain and maybe a big pile of dung someone along the way found interesting…it’s not interesting!  Put people in your pictures! If there is something noteworthy that you’re taking a picture of, get yourself or your friends in the front of it.  Kneel down by the dung!  You’ll give it scale and you’ll certainly look like a moron – now that is fun!    “A picture is worth a thousand words”…but if there are people in them, maybe you get two thousand!  “Look at her hair!” /  “They really made you wear khaki?”  Get it?

Hot Air Balloon Idea, New Zealand

2. One of the best ways to make your pictures more memorable is if you or your friends get yourselves into positions where it looks like your are holding something up with your hand, head, tongue.  The more unorthodox, the better.  See a statue of a hot General?  Why not get right in front of him,  get on your knees…and…say a prayer for him!  (I know where your mind went…good job!)   Think “The Washington Monument”.  So phallic—so large—so little time!  Get some action into your pictures.

3. If you’ve decided along the trip that you absolutely hate the person you’re traveling with — just take pictures of your feet.  Everyone likes their feet, right?  Actually, I enjoy taking pictures of peoples shoes…it’s a lot more interesting than it sounds.

4. Don’t be a hog!  Take pictures of others too, Narcissus!  There’s the other extreme where the person vacationing is in every-single-frickin-shot! No matter how hot they are, it gets boring if all we see is them.  OK, maybe a few body shots would be interesting?  I could look at that all day long!  I’m getting off subject.

5. Practice your smile!  New Rule:  Say: “WHISKEY” when you get your picture taken!  Never-ever say “cheese” again.  Try it.  “Whiskey” makes you use muscles in your face that lifts your smile and makes it look a lot more natural.  “Cheese” makes you pull your face back to the sides — and no wonder you hate to have your picture taken.

Eat Before You Play Polo

Final note:  If you want your friends to come over to look at your pictures —You Serve Cocktails!

—Let me hear from you.  Leave a post!  What do you think are the 5 things people need to know when they travel with someone they haven’t traveled with before?   Or, send me some of your most fun pictures, maybe I’ll put them up on the site—

 

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ICE (In Case of Emergency) In Your Phone

by Dean Hervochon on April 25, 2011

I’m not talking about the frozen water “ice” when I say that you need “ICE” in your phone.

ICE is an acronym for: “In Case Of Emergency”.

Paramedics and hospital personnel are trained to look for this in your phone if something happens to you.

If you’re in a car wreck and knocked unconscious, have you ever thought about how the hospital or police are going to be able to contact your loved ones?  (at least in a timely manner)

Make it easy for them.   Create a “contact” in your phone who’s name is:  ICE      Make it all capital letters.  Add the most important phone number in there — preferably someone you don’t travel with a lot but who can still make decisions for you.

In the “notes” section of the contact you could put:

Mother:               Janet Doe – 333-333-3333

Sister:                  Mary Dough – 222-222-2222

Husband:            Tom Doughnut – 111-111-1111

Whomever you want to be contacted.

If your phone doesn’t allow “notes” —just put the person’s number you would like to be called in case of an emergency.  I don’t recommend putting the name of a person you’re always with —like your spouse— put someone in there who knows who to contact and what to do if you need help.

Remember, if you’re got a “lock” on your phone, they won’t be able to get into it.

Have any ideas to share?    Lemme me know!

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Peeing in the middle of the night? Sit the “F” Down!

by Dean Hervochon on April 22, 2011

Men!  Listen up!  If you’re anything like me and you might have to pee in the middle of the night, make it easy on yourself — sit down to do it! This is especially true if you live with women!   I don’t have any idea why they are so territorial and dictatorial (pun intended) over that toilet—but they are!  Make your life easy, sit the “f” down to pee in the middle of the night!

And Wear Your Own Underwear Too!

If you think about it, it is common courtesy to not disturb anyone when “you’ve got to see a man about a water bill”, right?  No one wants to hear a racehorse pee while they’re trying to sleep (just referencing how I think I sound! …).  Be considerate!   If you’re living alone and you want to pee on the walls, all over the toilet, on the floor, your feet — whatever.   But, if you don’t clean the toilet and you want to be a good mate, sit down at night.  Also, don’t flush the toilet if all you’ve done is pee—it makes noise when you flush—that can wait until the morning.  Experience tells me that no man is a good shot in the middle of the night – especially if you’ve been drinking.  Hellllooo….make everyone happy and if you’re that drunk, at least you’ve got a place to sit while you sleep instead of falling into the shower door.

Here’s the deal you make with women.  If you promise to sit down in the middle of the night—they promise to get off your back about putting the toilet seat down.  I don’t understand their logic about that.   They want you to put the toilet seat down after you just raised it to not pee on it?  Well, why don’t men ask women to put the toilet seat UP after they’ve used it—if they do that—it won’t get peed on!   I don’t understand women making men 100% responsible for them not sitting in pee!   Alright, alright…I got that out of my system.

Here’s the truth:  I’m going to admit that I always put the toilet seat and lid down after I use it; it’s good Feng Shui.  I’m so gay!   Putting the lid down supposedly stops your money from “going down the drain”.   I read that years ago and I was hooked. Honestly, a bathroom is much more inviting if the person before you puts the lid down.   Don’t EVER do that in a public restroom – you want to limit your exposure to other people’s germs when you’re out in public!   Another thing you also should do, if you miss the toilet and hit the rim, wipe it off with toilet paper.  No one wants to see if you’ve taken your vitamins today or not.  Wipe off the toilet rim.

So remember men, sit down to pee in the middle of the night!

Does anyone have a better suggestion?  Let’s here it!

 

 

{ 4 comments }

“Don’t Waste Your Pretty!”

by Dean Hervochon on April 21, 2011

Girls…“DON’T WASTE YOUR PRETTY!”

"Don't Waste Your Pretty"

This is what I say to someone when they’re obviously wasting their time in a bad relationship.  It’s a short sentence and it just about says it all.

We all age…you are doing this as I type.  Ouch!  Now, not all of us (eh hem) are able to maintain our “good looks” throughout our lives, so wake up now and pay attention to what is going on in your life!   This actually applies to all ages…but I’ve seen way too many young, beautiful girls turn into: depressed; over-weight; hopeless complainers because they made the wrong decisions spending their precious time…and spending all their precious pretty on a jerk!

According to “Nice Girls Take Charge”, there are five rules every girl need to burn into their brain:

1.  Know what you want

2. Believe you deserve it

3. Communicate directly and concisely

4. Be prepared for “push back”

5. Put yourself first — you’ve got to get your needs met to be a happy partner

There is only a limited amount of time when we’re in our “prime”.   USE IT!  Take stock of where you are in your life — right now.  If you’re really not happy with the guy you’re spending the precious minutes of your life with—you’re never going to be happy with your “Prince” —no matter how much you drink, or eat, or smoke to fog your glasses, he’s not changing.   Bad relationships just get uglier as time goes on and I hate to tell you this, but you will get uglier too if you’re not happy.  If you’re with a guy who doesn’t honor you; elevate you; trust you; love you – I say: NEXT!   Now is not the time to waste your precious “pretty time”.

Use your assets while you have them.  “Don’t Waste Your Pretty!”  Got it?

Any other good advice in not wasting your time or energy or pretty on someone who doesn’t make you happy?

 

{ 5 comments }

Passwords — Never Forget Another Password — Ever!

by Dean Hervochon on April 15, 2011

Do you have problems remembering your passwords?

You’re not alone and hacking and “phishing” into your accounts is a real threat to you so you better get your passwords in order.  The best passwords contain letters, numbers and punctuation symbols / characters. You should not have the same password for all of your sites either, but I’m sure you already know that.  Right?  So, how do your remember different, secure passwords for every site you use?  You create an algorithm.  “A what?  I can’t do that!”  Oh yes you can! I literally just taught this to a ten year old.  Keep reading…even if you failed high school math.  This is easy once you get the hang of it. Don’t worry, The Go To Gay Guy to the rescue!

To create safe, secure, unique passwords — for each site you visit — all you have to do is remember “the code” in how you create them.  That’s what’s called an algorithm — a step by step method to make something work.   I owe this post to my friend and “GoToGeekGirl” Julie Gomoll.  Check her site out.  She’s a savant when it comes to “content marketing” and if you currently have a blog or website, she is amazing at getting you national recognition.   JulesSays.com

Here’s an example of how you could do it:

1.  Decide what letters you’re going to use from the name of the website you’re on – you have to do this.  Such as, if you’re using “Gmail.com”, pick two or three or even four letters from the website’s name.  Let’s say you are going to use the code of using the first two letters of the website’s name and the last letter.  So, for Gmail,that would be the:  “G,m and l (note I always keep the first letter as a capital to add even more security.)

2. The next thing you need to do, is pick  4 – 7 numbers that you can remember.  You could use your phone number, zip code or  any number of  digits you can remember and that come easy to you.  Let’s say you pick four numbers: 1234 (don’t pick something that easy!)  In your code, you could put the first two numbers at the beginning before your first two letters and the last two numbers before the last letter(s) you picked.  Here’s how that would look if we used Gmail:    12Gm34l   Get it?   I put two of my “always numbers” before the first two letters of  “Gmail” and the other two of my “always numbers”after those letters, followed by the last letter of “Gmail”, the “l”.     12Gm34l      Can you see it?  It’s making sense, right?

3. To add even more uniqueness to it, you could start and end your password with a special character (or put them anywhere you want, just so you remember where you always put them.)  You could use anything on your keyboard.  ?, !, $, %…    So, here’s how your new Gmail password might look:  !!12Go34e!!  —Your Yahoo password could be:  !!12Ya34o!! Citibank!!12Ci34k!!   —Your Hotmail password would be:  !!12Ho34l!!  Facebook: !!12Fa34k!!   Get it?  You’ll never get anything less than VERY STRONG when the site is telling you how secure your password is, if you use letters, numbers and characters.

It takes some practice to use your code, but once you start using it, you’ll never go back to remembering passwords. It’s going to feel odd to you that you really won’t actually know any of your passwords off the top of your head, you’ll just know the “code” to get into your sites. You’ll probably make mistakes when the site requires you to re-type your password, be careful when you type, you’ll get the hang of it after just a few sign-ins.   Stick with it.  Your code is your code, make it unique and change it from what I’ve used as an example here!  Devise a code with rules you can remember and if you have to change your password often, devise a code for what you will do when that occurs. I’d suggest that you take out a pencil and write down how you’re going to devise your own code.  Letters here, number there, characters here. You can use any order or characters, but always use some of the letters from the site you’re on to make it unique. Let me know how this works for you or if you’ve got any questions.  Pass it on to your friends…   If you’d like to make a comment on this, please make the comments on this site, rather than Facebook.  Thanks, Dean

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Babies in Restaurants — New Rules!

by Dean Hervochon on April 13, 2011

I Love Kids! But….

I personally have no problem with babies in restaurants. I love kids.

We can’t take “bad baby behavior” out on the babies, can we?  It’s not their fault if they’re screaming, running around or are sitting in the path of destruction. They’re babies — and they don’t know any better. Plus, it’s not cool to call babies assholes, so we’re going to direct all of this at their stupid, selfish parents. Ya ready?

Don't Blame the Baby!

Parents: If you take your baby to a restaurant so you can go out and enjoy a nice calm, beautiful meal, I applaud
you. You need a break. Raising kids isn’t easy nor is it for the weak of heart (if you’re raising them right!). Just like when you get a baby sitter and go out, the last thing you want to hear is a kid screaming for an extended amount of time.  Sure, kids and babies cry and yell, but if they do it for any length of time, say for over 30 seconds, remove your kid from “the scene of the crime”. Take your kids out of the public eye. Take them to the restroom, take them outside, or take them back to the car. That’s the decent thing to do for the sake of others who want peace and quiet while they’re dining out.

Was that so hard? Most people I encounter who have a screaming kid do exactly this. Bravo for you people! That is Gay Guy Approved!

sign in window: screaming children will not be tolerated

This should say: "RUDE PARENTS will not be tolerated! For crying out loud (pun intended), don't blame the kids!

Other Diners: If there is a screaming baby, don’t get your panties in a wad! Kids scream and yell and cry and throw things! I once got splashed from a creamer capsule that was smashed by the kid behind me. No big deal. They’re kids and it was really funny to see how upset his mother got! (It was only cream, I’ve had worse on me!) But…if they keep crying/acting up/running around for an extended period of time, I’m advising you to get up from your table — stay calm! — and ask someone who works in the restaurant (preferably the manager) to “offer assistance” to the parents of the child. If the parents don’t take that as a hint, then the manager should suggest that “the offenders” would be more comfortable in the bathroom or in a more secluded place in the restaurant. If that doesn’t work, you need to ask to move — and do it in a classy, non-confrontational, non-huffy way. Don’t get all territorial and righteous and act like a baby. There’s no sense getting in a fight with rude people, I can assure you. If they can’t take the social cues coming their way from the manager, they probably have a sense of entitlement that you can’t cure in one dining session. Move away from the scene of the crime.

And don’t forget, we’re all in this together…

What’s your experience with kids/parents acting up in a restaurant?

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5 Rules for Wearing a Scarf

by Dean Hervochon on April 12, 2011

Everyone looks good in a scarf!  If it’s the right scarf!

One of the best accessories any woman or man can add to an outfit is an appropriate scarf. A scarf is the easiest thing to put on and you can get them really inexpensively at any number of places. I’ve even seen some great scarves even at Walgreens! Ladies (and fruity men), of course you could always buy a $350 Hermes scarf —which is beautiful — but you don’t have to go “that big” to still get a great look. The scarf adds elegance to any outfit and it’s got a number of uses.

12 Great Scarves

12 Great Scarves

A scarf hides the wrinkles in your neck. No matter how much “work” you’ve had done, how much you’ve  stayed out of the sun or how much you’ve worked your body into a rock — the neck is the one part of the painting that never “makes it into the attic.”  Your neck reveals your age. A scarf is not only great at keeping the aging sun off your neck, but it keeps “inquiring eyes”  from guessing your actual age.  Those bitches! Do yourself a favor — to prevent future wrinkling and accurate age guessing — wear a scarf!

A Scarf Is Thinning!

It gets better! A scarf is thinning!  And I’m not talking about cinching it around your waist! When a long scarf is worn draped down between your breasts — cascading between your chest, the fabric “cuts” your torso in half and gives you a different texture to break the “canvas”. This gives some architecture to your body — any body — and that makes you look thinner. The caveat is that you have to tie the scarf  together or use a clip to keep each length together — draping like a man’s tie. If you just let it drape around your neck — the two lengths will fall on the outside of

Great Scarf

Great Scarf for Big and Small Women

your breasts — that will make you look larger. Uh Oh. An untied scarf looks fine if you’re thin, but if you’re not at your “optimal weight” — tie or clip the scarf together to make one long drape. You’ll no longer be one big surface, you’re now two smaller ones. It works!

When deciding on which scarf to buy, consider the color, size, texture and the time of year you’re going to wear it.

5 Rules of Scarf Wearing

Rule #1: Find a scarf that is the right shape for how you’re going to use it.  A longer rectangular one will give you many options in how to tie it and it allows you to drape it for more whimsy or affect.  The square scarf will give you ways to wear it in the most classic of ways.

Rule #2: The color of the scarf should compliment the outfit you’re wearing. If you want something subtle, get one that closely matches what you’re wearing. If you want to make a statement, go for something more bold and with lots of color.

Rule #3: The texture of the scarf is a personal preference, but I tend to like scarves that “move” and aren’t too heavy. Silk is the classic but there are many other options.  If you’re wearing a scarf for warmth, it’s going to be harder to find one that “moves”. If you can tolerate a lighter material in the cold weather — you will get more movement from it and it won’t look so “heavy” on you. The scarf should “move”, not lay on you like a dead raccoon in the middle of the road.

Rule #4: The scarf is the sexiest, classiest accessory any woman can wear. It ups your game in terms of dressing and it shows that you’ve got a level of sophistication that a lot of other women don’t possess. A scarf is for any aged girl or woman. They are functional and a fashion statement. I’ve seen them worn as belts too — I don’t like that use as much— and it really only looks good on thinner women.

Guy Working Out, No Scarf Needed

No Scarf Needed...

Rule #5: There are only a few instances when I think you don’t need to wear a scarf. Look to the right!  →

Here are some sites to show you the many ways a scarf can be tied. They are a good place to start…

This site sells scarves (for women)and has very simple videos on how to tie your scarf a number of different ways.

This site has some photos of how you can tie a man’s scarf.

What do you think?  Do you have a favorite way to tie your scarf?  How about a favorite story involving a scarf?   Let me know…   —Dean—

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